today is one of those days that I just wanted to scream....My dad and I are very close to each other and nearly talk about everything and anything that there would be out there for discussion....but we don't agree on some things and one of them is me finding an industerial job...although all my childhood dream have come true such as now working at university but I know if I want to excel more in my field I need to go out there...but when there is no opportunity and there are walls that won't let you in such as companies high archy..it irritates me alot and my dad although he knows how the economical situation is but keep on saying that I am not doing my best to find something for me...I am just so sick and tired of thinking of my self in other people's shoes...my dreams have come true but now I have to come up with new dreams for the next 10 years of my life but it nearly took me 9 years since 14 to get here..and now for sure it will take same amount of time...but I am very impatient and I feel lilke a spoiled 4 year old that want something right now right here...and ofcourse that won't happen...and that is exactly why I am so upset with myself....I am grown person but sometimes become so restless...I know what I am saying now meight seem strange and so out of order...but I am exteremly upset right now....